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Posts in ‘Relationship’

How to Get Back Together With Him

Mar 12

after many months of arguing and fighting, you both decided to quit it. You both are tired of the rows and sleepless nights. But after a week without him, you miss him. you realized that you were both rather hasty to make a rash decision. You still love him and would love to try to work on it. But then you are not sure if he wants you back and would still want to work on the relationship. So here is how to get him back into your life:

Relationship

• keep up to your “just be friends” line. Ask him out as friends even after the breakup. Suggest coffee. Check how he has been. This would also give you an idea if he is really over you or is just coping with every day just like you are.
• Ask his friends if he is really over you and what has he been telling them. This will give you a good idea as to whether you can try it out again
• Give him signals that you miss him. tell him that you remember the good times and you wish that it did not end so fast. If you get a positive response, then ask him if he wants to try it out again. If not, then forget about it. He is not worthy if he does not want you back as much as you want him back.
• Talk about your issues. There must have been issues that led you both to breaking up.
• Learn something from the failed relationship in hopes of rebuilding a new one.
• Go out with friends. do not make him feel as if your life would crumble without him. let him know that you are out having a ball so that he would not think that your world would revolve around him
• Do things that make you happy. This will make him realize that you can do without him. many men think that women need them. Make him realize that he is wrong for thinking this.
• Exercise. This will make you feel so much better about the breakup. This will also give you a fit and trim body, which other guys, including your ex would run after.
• Entertain other men. You do not need to go out on dates. But the word would get out to your ex that men are running after you. That would bring him running back to you.
• Keep the communication lines open with him. you do not want to ostracize him and kick him out of your life. you want him back in. so do send him text messages from time to time asking how he is. also call him from time to time sending him good wishes. That would show him that you still care for him
• Show your care and concern. If you know that he is going through a rough time at work, give him your moral support. He might have lost a girlfriend, but he does not need to lose a friend.
• Show your support in whatever he does. He will now open that little bookstore he has always wanted to for so many years. Let him know that you still care and believe in him. go to the opening of the bookstore and let him know that he did a great job.
• Let his friends know that you want him back. This will definitely get back to him.
• If he is willing to give it a try, go back to being friends. there must have been some lapse in your communication. So try to find where that gap came from and rebuild the communication. Be friends again and start talking well about things in your life.
• Learn from your mistakes and try to improve on the things that you lacked.
• Be sincere about wanting to make it work. Try to change yourself into a better person. But do not change everything about you. Just the things that need improvement.
• Talk about your situation. If you both want to make it work, talk about how you want things to work out this time around. plan things together.

As you both progress, you will be able to get him back into your arms. But remember that it will not be easy this time around. there will be old issues and problems. Make sure that you put in time and effort to make it work out this time.


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How to Get Over Being Jealous

Feb 11

Being jealous is the worst thing that any girlfriend or boyfriend could do to ruin a relationship. It is true that a little jealousy may help the relationship along, but once it has grown into something that is hard to control then it marks disaster for the couple experiencing it. This green eyed monster is really the most difficult to deal with, especially if you have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is popular. Most jealousy springs from girlfriends and boyfriends dwelling too much on what they think their partner is doing at that very moment. In essence, jealousy happens because there is a lack of trust between you and your partner.

Jealous

Jealousy can be controlled, but it takes a lot of effort from both parties to prevent it from happening at all. Here are some ways that you can try to control the jealous feeling that you have when you and your partner are not together:

1. Talk about it with your partner. Let him know what makes you jealous and things he should avoid doing so that your jealousy gets out of control. Let him know exactly how you are feeling about everything from when he works to when he hangs out with friends. Also tell him that you need his help in reducing this jealousy because it is not something that you often feel. By being honest with your significant other, he will respect your views and prevent himself from getting into situations that will only upset you.

2. Have a little more confidence and respect for yourself. Jealousy is a petty thing and you should be mature enough to handle it. When you are jealous, it only reflects your own shortcomings and insecurities. This makes women and men less attractive to anyone for that matter. What people want to see in you is confidence and maturity. By being a jealous person you show yourself as a petty, immature, and insecure person.

3. Find something productive for you to do, like a hobby that will keep you occupied or a good book. Find activities that will keep you busy. It is a well known fact that an idle mind is the devil’s playground. The less you do when you are alone, the more your mind will wander and dwell on what your boyfriend or girlfriend is doing at that moment. Then you’ll be tempted to call them up and demand what they are doing which will only upset the both of you. Keeping busy is the best way of dealing with moments that are open to moping, over-analyzing, and basically letting your imagination get the best of you.

4. Talk to someone about it. The best people to approach are friends and family who know you best and who can give you their own opinions on your situation. By getting the feedback from a third party you will realize how silly you are acting and you can find ways to get back to your normal self and overcome your jealousy. Your best friend can also help you in keeping busy and happy during the times you are alone so that you don’t let the jealousy get the best of you.

5. Set rules for yourself and your partner. Let him know that there are certain things that he should not do while you are together and situations that he should avoid when you are not together. If he looks at another girl while you are together, tell him straight away that it is upsetting you but try not to let the feeling carry you through into a dramatic situation that will embarrass you. Or control yourself and make a checklist in your mind and let him know about this list when you are alone together and can focus on one another.

6. Really weigh the situation and do the research before deciding if he is really cheating on you. If you think he is, then confront him, but make sure you have solid evidence of accusing him. The worst part about being jealous is that you only think that you are being cheated on, but in reality nothing is happening. Try to trust your partner a little more until you can get tangible clues that he is doing naughty things behind your back.


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Tips on Finding a Perfect Birthday Gift for Your Girlfriend

Dec 25

Your girlfriend’s birthday is coming up and now you are stuck in the same dilemma as last year – what to get her for her special day. The hardest part about getting gifts for your girlfriend is that you are never sure if she will actually appreciate it or not. Your best bet is to follow these words of advice so that you can more or less get her a gift that she will actually appreciate more than she’ll hate:

Birthday Gift

• What are your girlfriend’s interests and hobbies? What does she enjoy doing over all other things? If she is the type of girl who loves to get a makeover because it relaxes her, get her a gift certificate for a whole weekend at a spa which she can enjoy with a girlfriend. If she is into a particular sport, find out what gear or equipment she is lacking in her sports set and bring her to the store so she can choose her favorite brand. If she loves books, give her a gift certificate so that she can buy 5 of her favorite books at her favorite bookstore. Or maybe it is as simple as cooking her a home cooked meal followed by an intimate cuddling session.

• If she has a certain passion or hobby that she is pursuing then get her something that she will truly appreciate. If she is a stamp collector, try to find her a unique stamp that she doesn’t have yet. If she loves books, try to get her the one book she has been searching for but hasn’t found yet. By acknowledging that you appreciate her love for her hobby, she will definitely love whatever you give her in connection to it. It really is the thought that counts.

• If there are things that she neglects about herself because she cannot afford it or merely because she doesn’t have the time for it, try to provide it for her. Get her a weekend-long spa treatment that she has been longing for but never could afford. Or you can get her the universal remote unit and program it for her to take care of all her remote control needs at home. You could also get her car serviced and cleaned for her so that she doesn’t have to worry about it again. By doing these gestures, she will surely discover that you are attentive to her needs and are trying the best that you can to make things easier and more relaxed for her. Doing these things for her birthday will be something she will appreciate above many things.

• Plan a unique experience that you can enjoy together. In fact, plan three things and let her choose. That way you won’t be stuck with one activity that she may not enjoy entirely. Examples of presentable choices are scuba diving, a hot air balloon ride, or a bungee-jumping experience! Let her choose and enjoy the experience with her. You’ll definitely be reminiscing over that for the next few years.

• Take her on a weekend trip, just the two of you, to a place she’s always wanted to go. This may entail more spending on your part, but if she’s worth it, then definitely make it a birthday option. So whether it is a weekend in Mexico or in Hawaii, plan it so that you will be able to see the sights that are worth seeing and so that you’ll be able to spend romantic nights and moments with each other to cherish for a long time.

• If there is a special skill that she has always wanted to enhance, then sign her up for a class which she can participate to improve that skill. Classes in cooking, a foreign language, painting, or even gardening will do. Depending on what her interests are and what she has been longing to do for a long time, look for classes that will fulfill her desires and make her better at something. She will really enjoy that!

Now that you have the basic checklist of what to consider when getting your special someone a perfect birthday gift, go out and start looking at your options now. Remember, it really is the thought that counts, and the more thought you put into it, the more you will receive extra points for maintaining a happy relationship.


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How to Stay Passionate about Your Partner

May 25

After a long relationship, it is very difficult to stay excited about your partner. After seeing the same person day in and day out, it is rather hard to find something new about your partner. But it is necessary that you would be able to stay passionate about your partner if you want the relationship to work on. If you are getting bored with your partner, make sure that you do something to rectify this. It is going to hurt your relationship if you are getting bored of your relationship.

Partner

So here are some ways to look after your relationship by staying passionate about your partner:

• Date. Go out on dates. Make sure that you would book one night every week to date your partner. Do something that you both enjoy. It could be watching a movie, for going for some drinks. Just make sure that you take the time to date.
• Hold hands. It helps to have some intimacy. You do not need to be having sex to be intimate. Touching helps remind you of how much you love your partner.
• Kiss. Kissing is one of the things that help you stay passionate about your partner. Not only is it something you both will enjoy, but it will also probably excite you both, which is something that can remind you of the hot passion you both once shared.
• Hug and touch a lot. this is a good reassurance of your love for each other as you hold and touch each other.
• Look at old photos. There is nothing like strolling along memory lane to get your heart beating again.
• Things can get monotonous at times. Be spontaneous. Go out of town for the weekend. Go to the beach and just lay in the sand.
• Skip work and pick up your partner. Play hooky and enjoy the day lounging at home.
• Dress up very well for your partner from time to time. It will remind your partner of the many times his or her heart started beating when he or she saw you during the first few dates.
• Take the time to go out with friends. it is always good to also have a life apart from your life with your partner. It is not healthy to only have a life with him or her.
• Go out of town with your friends. you need to enjoy your life to be able to enjoy your life with your partner.
• Do not stop yourself from doing something you really want to do because your partner is not good at that. You both cannot be good at one thing. So make sure that you both do your own thing.
• Make sure that you both lead your own separate lives. You need to be able to have your own lives. This way you will be able to grow as individuals well.
• Look at old pictures. There is nothing like old pictures to remind you of the good times and take you down memory lane.
• spend time with your friends. even though you love each other very much, you need to have time with other people. This will allow you to learn more about other people and allow you to appreciate each other’s company more. If you are always with each other, you will become bored with the company eventually.
• do not always meet each other every day. you will get enough of that when you get married. You need time for yourself and other people. It is healthy that you have space between you both.
• Take time to go out with friends. go out of town with friends. this will give you time to get to know yourself and to give your partner space.
• Give yourselves space to breathe. You do not always need to talk and be together. You need to be your own persons. You need to grow as individuals and get to know your strengths and weaknesses.

It will not be easy to keep the passion running in the relationship. It is easy to get bored. But you must remember to always be conscious about this to be able to make your relationship work.


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How to go on After Someone had Cheated on You

May 15

One of the hardest moments in a relationship would be to find out that your special someone has cheated on you. It is difficult to find out that all the things you have believed turns out to be untrue. It is even more difficult to find out that the effort you have placed into the relationship seems to have meant nothing to that person. So how do you actually go on after the person you love the most has cheated on you?

Cheat

Here are some tips on how to go on after someone has cheated on you:
• Find out the reason as to why you were cheated on. There must have been a reason as to why your partner cheated on you.
• Do not blame yourself for your partner’s infidelity. There must have been a problem with the relationship. But that does not give your partner enough reason to be unfaithful to you.
• Do not be bitter about the whole thing. It is normal to feel terrible and to blame yourself. But you will get nowhere beating yourself up.
• It is best to spend time with friends and family during this time. You need the space to think as to how you want to go about with this situation.
• There are instances wherein the partner who cheated would want to get back together with you.
• Take all the time you need to assess as to whether getting back with that person would be worth it.
• Remember that there has been history of your partner cheating. You would not want to experience the same pain all over again. But then, this could also be a trial that would bring you both closer.
• Try to think back on the relationship. Length of the relationship is not a determinant as to whether you need to let it work. The depth is a factor though.
• Trust your gut feeling. You will be able to tell if he is sincere about getting back with you and how he actually feels about you.
• Get all the details about the affair from your partner. Though it might hurt, it is important that you know the details. If you feel that he is holding back or lying, then do not bother to try to work on it.
• Get advice from other people, such as close friends, family members and even people whom the both of you know. It would be nice to know what other people think. They are more objective and can see a better picture.
• Once you make a decision, stick to it. If you want to make it work, then put full effort into making it work. Try to take in your mistakes and find a way to make things better.
• If you want to call it quits, then stand by it. Make sure that you keep yourself busy in order not to feel tempted to keep in touch.
• It is best that you try to lose touch for the meantime. You do not need to be reminded of the pain you just went through. Plus it might be good to just keep some distance between you two. That way you would not be tempted to get back together with him.
• This is the time to love and take care of yourself. Give yourself time out. Allow yourself to breathe. Do not rush back into a relationship.
• Do not bother to pick a fight with the person your partner cheated with. It is not only that person’s fault. It takes two to tango. Your partner was equally at fault.
• Do not make excuses for your partner. There is no good excuse for doing this. He knew that he was in a relationship and should have been loyal.
Take your time to assess the situation. Do not make rash decisions which you might regret in the future. It is easy to just fall back into his arms as if nothing happened. but do not rush into this. Love yourself. Think about things carefully. Eventually you will find someone whom you can trust fully. Just keep your heart open and it will come.


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How to Know if you Both Should Still Work on the Relationship

Apr 18

A relationship with someone is one of the nicest things we can experience in our lifetime. However there are times when a relationship would not turn out the way you want it to be. There are times when feel that the relationship is rather toxic for the both of you. But if you feel that you can still work on it, then perhaps this is something you should consider.

Relationship

Here are some tips you should have take into consideration before deciding if you want to work on your relationship:

• Talk it out with your partner. Try to see what the problems were.
• Check if your partner is willing to give it another go. After all both of you would be working on it.
• Formulate concrete plans on how to make your relationship work
• Take the time off. Go to some place by yourself. Think about the relationship and see if it is worth placing more effort into.
• Come up with a pros and cons list. It might be easier to list things and see it on paper. See if your pros really outweigh the cons.
• Ask friends and family. Tell them to let you know what your good traits and bad traits are. See how these would apply to your relationship.
• Ask your partner what are the things he or she would want you to change in order to help the relationship.
• Tell your partner what are the problems you had with the relationship and with him or her in particular.
• If you both decide to work on it, then take the time off together. Go to some place romantic or just go out of town. There is nothing like some place quiet to help you guys talk about what has happened.
• Be honest to each other. Do not hold anything back just because you do not want to hurt the other person. It will be better for the relationship in the end if you let the other know how you feel.
• Be touchy. Touch each other again, like you did when you were first going out. Hug, hold hands and touch each other’s face, arms and waist like before. It might be hard initially but then try to do this more. It would bring you two closer and remind you of how your relationship started.
• Reminisce. Though it sounds cheesy, it helps to think about the past and remind yourself of how good it was.
• Kiss. It might seem really strange to kiss after a rough patch. But intimacy does help.
• Take the time to rebuild your relationship. Talk it over from time to time.
• Cry together. Crying also heals.
• Never blame the other for the pain. It takes two to tango. So the past failure of the relationship was not just the fault of one person. Perhaps one person was more at fault. But it was the efforts of both, or lack of, that led to the failing of the relationship.
• Do not rehash old problems. Do not start bringing up old issues. When you say try it again, it means that you would really try it again. By bringing these old issues up, you will only hurt your partner even more.
• Do not bring other people into the problem. Do not blame other people or use other people as an excuse for your problems. It is your relationship and your problem. Work on it together.
• Remember that a relationship is a two way street. There is no shortcut for this. It really takes effort and time, especially if it is an ailing relationship.
• Go out on dates. Make sure that you take the time to date because you both need time to relax.
• Be open about any problems that might come up. Nip the problem in the bud before it has the time to grow.

It would not be easy getting your relationship back on the road. It would be very difficult in fact. You will face a lot of heartache and a lot of tears. But remember that time heals all wounds. Talk about the pain. Talk about the problem. Do not be afraid to sound cheesy. After all communication is the best key to a successful relationship.


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How to have a Good Breakup

Mar 06

After trying to work on a relationship for some time now and realizing that it still does not seem to work, then maybe it is better to remain friends. it would hurt a lot because not only did you love your partner, but your partner has also become a good friend to you during the time you were together. It would hurt a lot as you have invested time, effort and love into the relationship. To see it crumble would be so painful to endure. But once you make the decision, stick by it and carry it out.

Break UP

Here are some good tips on how to have a good and clean breakup:

  • When you break up with someone, you would want to make it a clean breakup.
  • Do not try to go for a cool off period. It never works. Cool offs are only preludes to breakups. Just get it over and done with. A cool off is a strange situation. You both are neither in nor out of the relationship, making the rules very tricky. Do not put yourself in this kind of situation.
  • After you have decided to break it off, take to your significant other.
  • Tell your partner how you feel about the whole relationship. Tell your partner about all the problems you have with the relationship.
  • if you both feel that you are remedy it, then it would be good.
  • However if you cannot find a solution, then decide to breakup.
  • Although this might sound like a cliché, it is always good to break off as friends. after all you both started out as friends, it is best to end it off that way.
  • Let your partner know that you would like to keep the friendship. You might not be there for each other as you try to find your own paths. But then reassure your partner that you guys will be able to resume your friendship after some time.
  • You may give your partner a hug before parting.
  • Make sure that you give back pertinent documents back to your partner, such as supplementary credit cards.
  • Go through your stuff when you get home. make sure that important documents are passed to the right people. If you both have a business together, then make copies of important documents and give him a copy. There is no point in spoiling the partnership if you work well together. Just make a schedule that would not entail you to meet.
  • If you work in the same place, it might be awkward. So try to make sure that you do not see each other within the next few weeks. It will get easier after some time.
  • If you own big properties, make a decision as to whether you will sell it and split the profit. you can also sell your share to your partner if you are not so keen on the property.
  • Do not give back all the things you received during the relationship. That is rather petty. Give them away if you have to. That way you will not be reminded of things.
  • Do not attempt to get back what you gave to your partner during the relationship. It is even pettier. Do not be an Indian giver.
  • Do not stop your common friends from seeing him. they are not involved in this.
  • Do not stop your family members from seeing him as well. this will turn ugly if you do so.
  • Do send him a text message from time to time asking how he is. but do not pry to see if he is on dates or is already seeing someone.

A breakup is one of the hardest things to do in a relationship. But once you make this decision, stand by it. It is easy to take it back and just go back to being lovers.  But remind yourself that this is best for the both of you. If you are meant for each other, then you will get to a point wherein you will both realize that. But for now, it is best that you both remain friends and lead your separate lives.


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How to get a guy to notice you

Feb 15

So you have your eye on a guy. You are dying to go out with him. You have been eyeing since that time you bumped into him a month. You want to go out on a date with him. But you are not too sure if he likes you. So how do you go out on a date with him?

Guy

Here are some tips on how to make yourself irresistible to the guy you like:

• Place yourself within his vicinity. That way he would notice you more.
• When you are in a group and you see your boy, do not act boisterous and loud. It might just turn him off. But do show some enthusiasm for the conversation you are carrying with your friends. you would not want him to think you are a bore.
• Make friends with him. If you mingle in the same social circle, be friends with his friends. eventually you will get to know him.
• Be confident. All guys like a confident girl who can express herself well.
• Talk to other people. Do not make that guy think that he is the only person you will talk to. Mingle with other guys to make him realize that he is not the only guy in the planet.
• Do your own thing. If you excel in what you are doing, you will definitely catch his attention.
• Invite him to go out with you and your friends. that way he would get to know you better.
• Talk to him. Guys like girls who talk to them. They like girls who are confident enough to express their opinions.
• Be expressive with your opinions. Do not be afraid to talk about how you feel about something. But do not overdo it.
• Flirt with the guy you like. As you get to know him better, feel free to flirt with him. But do not flirt too much. He might think you are an easy catch.
• Be a girl. Let him help you cross the street and open doors for you. This does not mean that you are not independent. It would just make him feel like a man for being able to take care of you.
• Do not talk too much. Guys like women who listen to them. There is a time to talk and a time to listen. Be sensitive on that.
• If you guys are going out, get there 5-10 minutes late. That way he would not get the impression that you are too eager to go out with him.
• Be honest. If he asks you some questions about your past and your life, tell him about it. You do not want to start off a potential relationship with lies. But do not give all the facts just yet. Take your time to get to know more about him before you reveal more about yourself.
• Touch him when given a chance. If you are walking on the street, touch his arm as if to support yourself. You can also touch his arm if you want to call his attention on something. This will make him wonder if you actually like him or are just calling his attention. Keep him wondering. It will add your charm.
• Send him a text message or call him. if you work together or hang out in the same group, there are enough reasons as to why you can call him. when you do call him, ask him how he is. He would start wondering if your concern for him is something stemmed from friendship or because you actually like him.
• If he shows some interest, show him the same interest back. But once again do not be too eager.
• If he asks you out, do not make yourself too available. Do not jump at his first invitation. Try to reschedule. If he is interested enough, he would ask you again.

There are many ways on how to make a guy notice you. One tip would be to just be yourself. Do not try to act like someone you are not. Do not go out of your way to please him. when he starts noticing you, remember to play it cool. It would be nice to jump the first instance he asks you out. But try to avoid this so he will know that you are not an easy catch.


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