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Posts from February, 2010

How to Get Your Girlfriend’s Dad to Accept You

Feb 24

The worst part about dating a girl is dealing with her strict and over-protective father. For any man, it is a terrifying experience to meet the girlfriend’s dad and try to make a good impression on him. If you want to be the man in their daughter’s life, you have to be perfect, honest, and must have their daughter’s best interest in mind.

Girlfriend

So for those who are about to meet their girlfriend’s dad for the first time, or have met him and need to impress him even more, here are a few tips to help you in your mission:

• Do your research and find out more about your girlfriend’s dad. Talk to her about him and her whole family. Find out what kind of relationship he has with other members in the family. Find out basic information like what his regular job is, his hobbies, and his quirks. Be honest with your girlfriend that you want to know more about her dad because you want him to like you, especially since you and she will be together as a couple for a while. Upon knowing this, your girlfriend will surely try to help you get on the good side of her father.

• Upon meeting him for the first time, don’t be afraid! Or at least try not to look like you are afraid! Be confident and shake his hand firmly. Many men base another man’s worth in the kind of handshake that he gives. If the handshake is firm, it will reflect maturity and trustworthiness already.

• Find something that you can discuss with her dad which covers both your interests. This is when your research will come in handy. If you both like cars, then you can discuss that whenever you meet. Later when you are more comfortable with her dad you might want to invite him to a car show where they are displaying the latest racecar models. Or you could spend an hour watching a show about cars together. If you find something you can talk about and enjoy in common, you have a better chance of getting along with him over the long-run, which is comfortable for both him and you.

• Many dads worry about the intentions that men have for their daughters. After all, they were young men too and went through the same experience from meeting the dad to lusting after beautiful women. Always treat your girlfriend with respect in front of him, and always listen to what she says when she talks to you. Be a gentleman by opening car doors or any doors for her. Offer to carry heavy things for her or to help her when she does household chores. By treating her well and with respect, you will definitely win her father’s respect and trust as well.

• Whenever you take her out, make sure you bring her home on time. Nothing peeves a father more than a boyfriend who brings his daughter home way past her curfew. This in itself is a trust issue. As a parent, he worries about where his daughter is and what she is doing. Before taking her out, give her dad clues as to what you have planned with her that night whether it is a movie at a specific theater or dinner in a particular restaurant. Her father will appreciate that you are giving him important information that will reassure him of your whereabouts while you are out.

• Avoid public displays of affection with your girlfriend, especially with her father around. Don’t go to her house and hang out in her room with her with the door closed. Always opt to hang out with her in a common area like the living room or the family room. Be clear with your girlfriend that you want to avoid her dad being suspicious of him and she will understand. Respect their home by not getting into any hanky-panky while you are there. It is a family home and you should follow their home rules, whether spoken or unspoken.

It may be hard to win your girlfriend’s father over, but with these great tips you can start getting along with him. By simple respect for him and his daughter, you can get far in terms of getting the same respect from him.


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Principles for Your First Date

Feb 20

Going on your first date means more than just a nerve-wracking experience that you may either love or hate. It is both an exercise in strategy and a display of your character to someone who you’re just getting to know. Having a solid base in knowing what to do in a first date can save you from much embarrassment and nail your target right in the bull’s eye.

First Date

You really have to relax right before you storm the front. Before you can start winning battles, you have to win over your nerves. Whatever may relieve you of any sort of stress, like a soothing massage or some meditation, make sure to prepare yourself thoroughly. A woman wants to be with a confident man who is calm and with a plan in all sorts of situations. It also shows that you really do have interest in her first.

To exude your confidence, you must look your very best. This may be one of the most cliche of all dating principles, but that is only because it works. While you don’t really need to dress really sharp, women would not want to date men with bad breath and body odor. Hygiene takes up most of this part, which means that your daily habits go a long way to how you would present yourself to your date. It is definitely important to have that habit of bathing regularly, brushing and flossing, using deodorant when needed, and wearing clean clothes. That first impression is the golden key to women’s hearts.

Deciding on the venue itself is also crucial in preparing for a date. While it can be said that you can always just take your date to somewhere remotely interesting and it wouldn’t really matter as long as you play your cards right, it should not be taken for granted. The mood is everything in a date, and the venue is what affects the atmosphere the most. Make sure to pick a good one that would not give too many problems.

The means of getting to the venue with your date is another crucial factor. Transportation must be taken under serious consideration as it is like one’s clothes. If shows your attention to detail and ability to look ahead, as breaking down and not getting there is not just a poor showing, but could spell disaster to your chances with her. This goes with either your own car or getting a taxi.

Money is definitely an important issue that is the primary reason why a lot of men bite nails and pull hairs when it comes to the issue of dating. Attitudes about who pays is a bit looser nowadays with more women having good paying jobs than back in the dark ages. However, picking up the tab yourself still brings in the most bonus points, whether with cash or credit card.

Also, bring some protection. While you should not be raising your hopes up, you may never know. Bringing a condom is good practice, whether you are going to actually have success with your date or not. It is insurance that will prevent sexually-transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies that have plagued so many would-be couples who have sex, either for the first time or otherwise.

The biggest part of the date is definitely the conversation. This is where a lot of people get it wrong. While intimidating, it should not be too hard for you to have a good conversation with the woman, so long as you are not too intimidated by the task. Questions are ice-breakers and a good way to learn more about the person. Meanwhile, compliments are double-edged swords that can either spell success or disaster. The thing to remember is to not overdo it at all. Once you get comfortable with it, then there should not be too much to worry about, so long as you do not have a slip of tongue.

Of course, the most important principle in your first date is to be yourself. As long as you do not go overboard, being yourself will show your honesty and sincerity towards the other person. There really is no need to pretend as it may never really work to your advantage as you may think if you do lack the self-confidence to stay true to yourself. Those who pretend to be someone else tend to smell of failure, if you get the drift. However, you do not have to reveal too much information about yourself right off the bat. It is just the first date, so keep her interested in you by revealing tidbits about yourself. This way, you do not show anything too offensive and keep her wanting to know more.


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Planning the Perfect Date

Feb 12

Finding the formula for the perfect date has been one of the greatest quests undertaken by mankind. We have different opinions about it, and that may get in the way of learning the true artform of the perfect date.

Perfect Date

Ask women about it and they would say that it is all about a nice evening out with dinner and conversation, followed up by a stroll in the moonlight with her man. Perhaps a drink or desert along the way, and more flirting as well. They desire a slow and steady build up that is romantic and not necessarily intimate. Ask men about it and they would say that anything that leads to the promised land. This shows that we have different ideas about the same experience, leading to difficulties in objectifying what is supposed to be a subjective experience.

It is hard to say, but the formula to the perfect date does exist. It is all about balancing the best of both worlds and plan it ahead without being too meticulous on each detail. While it is traditional to have the male plan the date all the time, there may be no room for tradition nowadays in these days as taboos are eased up and traditions become obsolete. The perfect date is up to both individuals who are looking for a good time.

While there are as many guides and ideas to dating as there are stars in the night sky, it must be known that they are no set principles to dating. The rules are flexible and the true basis for success is improvisation. Original ideas go a long way to creating an atmosphere that is always fresh and new to both of you. This will ensure that you both have enjoy each and every time. However, it is not bad at all to read these guides since they are breeding ground for ideas and keep you informed about various things on what not to do.

As Sun Tzu had stated in the Art of War, know thy enemy. Well, we’re not really talking about enemies here, but that principle does help here. Knowing your date will go a long way in preparing for it. It can give you ideas on the venue and what you may want to show that person. You should know what type of food she likes and her greatest interests in life. You can then match it up to whatever place may suit her fancy.

The time and place are crucial to success. You do not always have to set it on Friday or Saturday evenings and lasting only a few hours. You can have a date during the day and at a particularly appropriate location while still making it fresh and original. The restaurant and coffee shop are always solid locations, but know that they are the most common venues for dates. You can try the amusement park, which is also good, but just about every lighthearted romance movie or television show sets dates in such locations. The possibilities are only limited by the scope of your imagination. You can go to a concert, museum, zoo, beach, park, or any other location that may give her a sense of enjoyment. When it comes to this, try to be creative with your approach.

It does not always have to be about her though. You can also share your interests to your date on your succeeding dates. This gives you more options on venues and also a good way to learn more about each other. You may never know when that person actually shares your interests. That is where relationships start to bloom. Of course, don’t assume too much.

You have to have a set goal on each date. Whether it is to know more about your date, getting your date to open up to you, or just show her a good time, each activity helps in a different way. The better you determine these factors, the better you can execute whatever plans you may have for a date. Taking it slowly does not have to be tedious at all.

As with everything else, you need to figure out what will make a date “perfect”. Remember that it is a subjective experience, so it may be different for each individual. The most important thing to note is that a balanced set of determinants will make sure that you can get it right without having to have sweaty palms about it. Balance will take you a long way.


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How to Get Over Being Jealous

Feb 11

Being jealous is the worst thing that any girlfriend or boyfriend could do to ruin a relationship. It is true that a little jealousy may help the relationship along, but once it has grown into something that is hard to control then it marks disaster for the couple experiencing it. This green eyed monster is really the most difficult to deal with, especially if you have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is popular. Most jealousy springs from girlfriends and boyfriends dwelling too much on what they think their partner is doing at that very moment. In essence, jealousy happens because there is a lack of trust between you and your partner.

Jealous

Jealousy can be controlled, but it takes a lot of effort from both parties to prevent it from happening at all. Here are some ways that you can try to control the jealous feeling that you have when you and your partner are not together:

1. Talk about it with your partner. Let him know what makes you jealous and things he should avoid doing so that your jealousy gets out of control. Let him know exactly how you are feeling about everything from when he works to when he hangs out with friends. Also tell him that you need his help in reducing this jealousy because it is not something that you often feel. By being honest with your significant other, he will respect your views and prevent himself from getting into situations that will only upset you.

2. Have a little more confidence and respect for yourself. Jealousy is a petty thing and you should be mature enough to handle it. When you are jealous, it only reflects your own shortcomings and insecurities. This makes women and men less attractive to anyone for that matter. What people want to see in you is confidence and maturity. By being a jealous person you show yourself as a petty, immature, and insecure person.

3. Find something productive for you to do, like a hobby that will keep you occupied or a good book. Find activities that will keep you busy. It is a well known fact that an idle mind is the devil’s playground. The less you do when you are alone, the more your mind will wander and dwell on what your boyfriend or girlfriend is doing at that moment. Then you’ll be tempted to call them up and demand what they are doing which will only upset the both of you. Keeping busy is the best way of dealing with moments that are open to moping, over-analyzing, and basically letting your imagination get the best of you.

4. Talk to someone about it. The best people to approach are friends and family who know you best and who can give you their own opinions on your situation. By getting the feedback from a third party you will realize how silly you are acting and you can find ways to get back to your normal self and overcome your jealousy. Your best friend can also help you in keeping busy and happy during the times you are alone so that you don’t let the jealousy get the best of you.

5. Set rules for yourself and your partner. Let him know that there are certain things that he should not do while you are together and situations that he should avoid when you are not together. If he looks at another girl while you are together, tell him straight away that it is upsetting you but try not to let the feeling carry you through into a dramatic situation that will embarrass you. Or control yourself and make a checklist in your mind and let him know about this list when you are alone together and can focus on one another.

6. Really weigh the situation and do the research before deciding if he is really cheating on you. If you think he is, then confront him, but make sure you have solid evidence of accusing him. The worst part about being jealous is that you only think that you are being cheated on, but in reality nothing is happening. Try to trust your partner a little more until you can get tangible clues that he is doing naughty things behind your back.


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