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A Brief Lesson on How to Stop your Spouse from Divorcing You

You may think the idea of saving your marriage is hopeless at this point. This may be true, or perhaps there is still hope.

In fact, taking the initiative to read this article may be a sign your marriage still has a chance. Hopefully your spouse is still willing to make it work. If so, the following marriage-saving tips may change things around for the better:

—Work on improving communication. If you have been working on this aspect of your relationship for quite some time then remember to listen as much-or even more than you talk.

—Express your thought and feelings in a non-threatening way. There is a more respectful way to communicate your thoughts and feelings to your partner. You do not need to accuse the person of not caring about you and you also don’t need to verbally attack the person in order to make your point clear.

It is better to state how you feel about a situation and what exactly you want done about it. While doing so you may want to open up with the fact that you still love your partner, or that the reason why you are bringing up your concern is because you still care and you want to find a way to make the relationship work.

—Accept things the way they are. If you want to stay married, you may face the possibility of having to accept things the way they are. Perhaps in doing so you can see past your partner’s negative qualities and focus on what first attracted you to the person.

—Go on Dates Again. Perhaps part of the reason your marriage is suffering is because the focus is too much on you as parents and you as a family. It is okay for couples to spend time with one another-just the two of them. If you make some for your relationship you will remember what brought you together.

—Face sexual issues head-on. If sex is an issue in your relationship, try to find a creative way to enhance your love life in the bedroom. This may require some open-mindedness and sensitivity on your part. You can read books about how to gracefully bring up issues pertaining to sex.

—Work on yourself. Sure, couple’s counseling may do you some good, but individual counseling would also help. If you keep the focus on bettering yourself your partner’s faults will matter less.

All in all, the best advice you can get if you are in a situation that seems hopeless is to not give up. Sometimes it can take several years to mend a broken marriage. If you have the time to put in you may reap the reward of spending a happy retirement with someone you love.

If you do decide you need to end your marriage-or your partner initiates divorce-try not to be vindictive. You may have hurt feelings, but if you can at all salvage a friendship out of it for the sake of your children that would be for the best.

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