Is it Over? How to Know if it is Time to End a Relationship

It can be hard to decide whether or not you should end a relationship. This decision should not be taken likely, as deep feelings are often involved.

 Some signs you should end a relationship include the following:

• You or the other person is unwilling to work things out.  Another sign might be that you or your partner is very unhappy despite any efforts between you to keep it together.

• If you are being repeatedly cheated, hurt, and lied to it is a good sign it is time to let it go.

• You shudder at the thought of spending the rest of your life with the person you are with.

• You have absolutely no love left for the person and you are unwilling to explore why this is the case.

• You feel bad most of the time you are with this person.

• For instance, you may feel that no matter how hard you try nothing you do is good enough. For instance, perhaps your partner might not appreciate anything you love to do for people, such as making meals for him/her, or buying gifts.

• The person is too irresponsible:  She frequently forgets to call when she says she is going to, or he is always late. Perhaps one or the other cannot hold down a job or is emotionally unstable and is doing nothing to improve his or her life.

• Your rights as a person are for the most part not respected. You also do not feel as though your feelings, thoughts, and opinions matter.

• Your partner has habits or behaviors that you absolutely cannot live with. For instance, perhaps your partner has a sever drinking or drug problem and cannot break the habit.

•  You cannot deal with defects in your partner’s character. For instance, the person may be too demanding, controlling, or insecure.  Your partner may seem overly-jealous and may want to attempt to control where you go, who you spend your time with, what you eat, and so on.

• Your partner discourages you from pursuing your dreams. These could be hobbies you want to develop or career aspirations. No one should take away from you the things you find important.

• You no longer look forward to spending time with your partner. You also feel relieved when you leave the person.

Keep in mind, however, that some relationship problems are temporary. For instance, one person may be temporarily depressed because a family death, job loss, or other major change.

Situations like this may be dealt with by giving your partner space to grieve. Furthermore, reaching out to others and making efforts to put the “spice” back into your relationship might help.

If the problem prolongs longer than for the time necessary, however, you may want to consider exploring the problem. If after a certain amount of time you and your partner cannot make things work then you may decide to go ahead and call it quits.

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