What to Remember When Dating a Single Father
To women out there, it’s not just about the single mothers facing problems in the dating world, it’s the single fathers as well! A single father is faced with far more than a fulltime job to provide for his family, he is also faced with raising his children alone and making sure that he does it right. For the women out there dating single fathers, you may be in for a lot more than you expect. Aside from getting the father, you get all the kids too, so it’s better if you are well prepared for it – if you are willing to take it on of course. Here are a few things to remember when dating a single father:
- Is this right for you? Now that you know that he has one or more little tykes waiting for his attention at home, are you willing to be a part of a readily packaged little family? Being with a single dad requires more understanding on your part than on his. You have to remember that his world will revolve around his kids and he won’t be able to drop everything on a whim to come running to you when you are in an emotional crisis of your own. Be mindful that he has his own schedule that covers work, home, and his kids’ schedules and that he has no freedom to change any of it unless you give him at least 2 days notice.
- Be open-minded when dating a single father because you may run into situations that you are not used to. This may entail rushing to the hospital because of a child’s injury, staying home with a sick child and entertaining them to make them feel less miserable, or attending ball games and ballet recitals because it means so much to both father and child. It may be different, but try it out anyway and you may find that you’ll enjoy some of the activities that you get to do together.
- Don’t expect the kind of romance that you would have with a regular single man. A single dad has to think about raising his children and bringing home the bacon. Whether you fit into this or not may be entirely up to you and him. Plan weekends together where you would leave the kids with his parents and have the place to yourselves. Try to be the romantic one instead of expecting him to do it all the time. And when he does take the effort to send you roses or make you a home-cooked meal, this is a great sign that he is willing to do a lot to make things between you and him work out.
- Don’t force yourself on his kids. When you are first introduced to them, don’t expect them to like you straight away. Children get very suspicious of strangers who spend a lot of time with their parent. They feel threatened that you are imposing on their family time and that you might take their father away from them. Just go with the flow and don’t force the issue. Don’t try to be their mother by telling them to eat their vegetables or trying to discipline them. Instead, approach them as a friend and find out more about them as time passes so that you can understand their needs and feelings as well.
- Be open with your partner, the single dad, about the way that you feel about his children and how you can further nurture the relationship between yourself and him, and yourself and the kids. If you are concerned about any of his children’s needs that he has not spotted, let him know straight away. Sometimes it takes an outsider to see the real problems within a family. He will appreciate you voicing your concerns, but don’t give him any advice about it unless he asks. You don’t want to undermine his parenting role.
The best thing that you will find out about your new partner is that many single dads make great parents. So when dating a single dad, look at the brighter side of it if you end up marrying, he’ll know how to raise your own children even better than you!