How to Get Over Being Jealous
Being jealous is the worst thing that any girlfriend or boyfriend could do to ruin a relationship. It is true that a little jealousy may help the relationship along, but once it has grown into something that is hard to control then it marks disaster for the couple experiencing it. This green eyed monster is really the most difficult to deal with, especially if you have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is popular. Most jealousy springs from girlfriends and boyfriends dwelling too much on what they think their partner is doing at that very moment. In essence, jealousy happens because there is a lack of trust between you and your partner.
Jealousy can be controlled, but it takes a lot of effort from both parties to prevent it from happening at all. Here are some ways that you can try to control the jealous feeling that you have when you and your partner are not together:
1. Talk about it with your partner. Let him know what makes you jealous and things he should avoid doing so that your jealousy gets out of control. Let him know exactly how you are feeling about everything from when he works to when he hangs out with friends. Also tell him that you need his help in reducing this jealousy because it is not something that you often feel. By being honest with your significant other, he will respect your views and prevent himself from getting into situations that will only upset you.
2. Have a little more confidence and respect for yourself. Jealousy is a petty thing and you should be mature enough to handle it. When you are jealous, it only reflects your own shortcomings and insecurities. This makes women and men less attractive to anyone for that matter. What people want to see in you is confidence and maturity. By being a jealous person you show yourself as a petty, immature, and insecure person.
3. Find something productive for you to do, like a hobby that will keep you occupied or a good book. Find activities that will keep you busy. It is a well known fact that an idle mind is the devil’s playground. The less you do when you are alone, the more your mind will wander and dwell on what your boyfriend or girlfriend is doing at that moment. Then you’ll be tempted to call them up and demand what they are doing which will only upset the both of you. Keeping busy is the best way of dealing with moments that are open to moping, over-analyzing, and basically letting your imagination get the best of you.
4. Talk to someone about it. The best people to approach are friends and family who know you best and who can give you their own opinions on your situation. By getting the feedback from a third party you will realize how silly you are acting and you can find ways to get back to your normal self and overcome your jealousy. Your best friend can also help you in keeping busy and happy during the times you are alone so that you don’t let the jealousy get the best of you.
5. Set rules for yourself and your partner. Let him know that there are certain things that he should not do while you are together and situations that he should avoid when you are not together. If he looks at another girl while you are together, tell him straight away that it is upsetting you but try not to let the feeling carry you through into a dramatic situation that will embarrass you. Or control yourself and make a checklist in your mind and let him know about this list when you are alone together and can focus on one another.
6. Really weigh the situation and do the research before deciding if he is really cheating on you. If you think he is, then confront him, but make sure you have solid evidence of accusing him. The worst part about being jealous is that you only think that you are being cheated on, but in reality nothing is happening. Try to trust your partner a little more until you can get tangible clues that he is doing naughty things behind your back.